The FORGOTTEN Developmental Milestone

I'm still reeling with shock. How is it that after faithfully reading every developmental milestone list I have, this one has been conveniently omitted!?!

How did it not make the list? I cannot fathom anyone overlooking such a huge change. Such a significant alteration should not be left for the parents to find out themselves.

Okay, I'm taking a deep breath and now I'll show you what I've been going on about...

Ya! You'd think that an 18 month old child growing her first mustache would be on the list right? I mean one minute she was my pretty, prissy petal and the next she looks like she's ready to enter the ring as a Spanish bullfighter!

Oh! And as if that wasn't enough, then this developed a couple of days later...

Something tells me it won't be the last time I see a mustache spring up above her curvy little lip. I suspect I'll be seeing cherry red, raspberry blue, and apple green mustaches up there all too soon but at least I'll be prepared for it.

These are the milestones that books don't record, but that a mother's heart holds dear. Milestones like dropping something in the toilet, getting gum in their hair, putting a diaper on their baby, and sharing their snack with a friend all go down on the tablet of our hearts.

What precious unlisted milestones have your children achieved lately?

Give Without Buying This Christmas

Is it possible to give without buying? Absolutely! Here’s one way to make it work.

Have you ever secretly wanted to suggest to the family that we skip a year of buying presents? I have. Don't get me wrong I love to give and see people's faces light up, but the time and expense of shopping for gifts and then wrapping them all year after year can be overwhelming.

Why not take a break one year and have a no purchase necessary Christmas? Don't worry this doesn't involve tapping into your "crafty" side, so you won't end up with second degree hot glue gun burns. What I propose is a book, magazine or DVD exchange. Stop buying and just give.

First, exchange names. I suggest women exchange with women, men exchange with men, and children exchange with children. Then, wrap up that book (or another item) that you just couldn't put down this year and share it with your selected family member. Children can exchange their favorite Berenstain Bears book for an Amelia Bedelia, and adults might exchange a Nora Roberts mystery for Showdown by Ted Dekker.

You can still enjoy the joy of giving and the recipient will learn more about you and what kind of books you like. Perhaps they will become a fan of your favorite author or realize that science fiction books aren't as bad as they thought.

Another idea is to collect your year’s subscription of magazines and trade them up with someone. Trade your "Better Homes and Gardens" for a year's supply of "Runner's World"　especially if you know your family member has that ever popular New Year's resolution to lose weight and eat better. In this age of reduce, reuse, recycle it's a great way to make the most of what we have.

The winter weather is a perfect time to stay inside and cozy up with a book. Whether it be a snow day, a cold winter's night or a long line at the grocery store, it's nice to have a good read that you can pick up and be entertained by. Books are still a wonderful gift. They take no batteries and require no maintenance or manuals. Just open and enjoy.

So be brave and suggest a book exchange to your family and friends this Christmas. I think you'll have a great time and find that others are just as relieved as you are to have a Christmas on the lighter side. Who knows, maybe a no purchase necessary Christmas will become a tradition for you. So stop buying and just give!

For more frugal ideas visit LifeasMom.

Have you ever done something like this? Would you consider trying it?

Oprah Envies Me

I saw Oprah at the grocery store today! She was wearing a solid red dress and looking fabulous with her arms open wide, and beaming at me from the cover of her magazine. And do you know what I thought?


"Oh Oprah, as much as you have done, and as much as you have, I don't envy you. But, I think you might envy me. Do you ever wish you had known the miracle of a child growing in your womb? Do you ever imagine the elation of hearing a squeaky voice exclaiming "Mommy, Mommy!" and seeing a busy body girl bobbling towards you for a hug? Do you ever daydream about trips to the circus, the library, or the zoo? Do you anticipate the day you hear her read her first words?"


I have known these joys, and these joys alone are enough for me to appreciate my life as is. Oprah can be Oprah while I remain significantly insignificant mommy me.


Being a wife and mother is my primary calling and delight right now so the red carpet will have to wait for me. In fact, the only crimson carpet, I will ever walk will probably be the one stained with ketchup and cranberry juice. And you know what? I think that's just as exciting as some old solid red runner.


Let's face it. No one has it all, but what I have is all right with me.

Shepherding a Child's Heart: Ch 11 Embracing Biblical Methods: The Rod

Welcome to the open discussion and reading of a wonderful book entitled Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp. Feel free to join in!

Chapter 11 in a Nutshell

Reading Ch. 11 was a bit like trying to eat an entire "Death by Chocolate" cake in one sitting. In other words, it was amazingly rich with excellent teaching but hard to digest all at once. And with a topic like The Rod you really need to "taste" the chapter for yourself to understand the greatness of what is being said. However, I will try to give you a slice of what I learned.

Avoiding the Rod

We live in an age where stories of child abuse often permeate the news, and our natural reaction may be to avoid any resemblance of such actions. Or perhaps the rod showed up in your life but was not properly administered and so you have vowed to never spank your children. Others choose not to spank because it is no longer fashionable or deemed acceptable. However, keep reading and you may begin to see why communication and the rod work together to address the child's needs. (Specifics on using the rod will be addressed in Ch 15.)

Authority of the Rod

Let's dig for some treasures in the greatest treasure chest of all time-God's Word.

Proverbs 22:15 says "Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him."

So what does is say is bound in the heart of my sweet, precious, adorable girl?

Yep, folly or no fear of God, a lack of wisdom, one who follows their own selfish desires. When is the last time your toddler said, "Mom, why don't you just relax and enjoy your lunch while I sit here and wait patiently."

So what will help me to help her drive out the folly (not to be confused with childishness) that is within her?

The rod

As Tedd says, "The young child who is refusing to be under authority (God and parents) is in a place of grave danger."


However, keep in mind that, "Use of the rod is not a matter of an angry parent venting his wrath upon a small, helpless child. The use of the rod signifies a faithful parent recognizing his child's dangerous state and employing a God-given remedy."

Acting in Love: The Rod Rescues

Proverbs 29: 15 says, "The rod of correction imparts wisdom..." Especially with younger children they need a physical reminder coupled with communication to be warned about the foolishness of their actions. Remember unchecked sin leads to death. According to Mr. Tripp "Properly administered discipline humbles the heart of a child,...and renders him compliant and ready to receive life-giving words."


What is the Rod?

"The rod is a parent, in faith toward God and faithfulness toward his or her children, undertaking the responsibility of careful, timely, measured, and controlled use of physical punishment to underscore the importance of obeying God, thus rescuing the child from continuing in his foolishness until death." - Tedd Tripp

Side note: Tedd states in this section, "A spanking is very different when administered by a non-parent." I had not given this much thought, but now that I have a child I think this point is very important. I will not give others permission to spank my daughter. What do you think about this point?

What the Rod is NOT

Not the Right to Unbridled Temper

Not the Right to Hit Our Children Whenever We Wish

Not Venting Frustration

Not Retribution (making them "pay" for what they did rather than seeking to restore a right relationship with the child and the offended party)

Not Associated with Vindictive Anger

Common Mistakes with the Rod

Spanking in anger

Inconsistent use of the rod

Failure to persist

Failure to be effective

Remember: "Spanking should be a private three way event -God, parent and child."

The Fruit of the Rod

Hebrews 12:11 "No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it."

Communication + The Rod = Balance

Tedd makes a great analogy saying, "If you focus exclusively on either the rod or communication, you will be like a ship with all the cargo loaded on one side. You won't sail very well."

Discussion/Application

Keep in mind I have not done this chapter justice and I strongly encourage you to read the entire chapter. However, I think enough has been given to generate plenty of discussion, and yes I realize not everyone will agree and that is fine as long as you do so respectfully. With that said, What in the world are your thoughts on the rod?

Would you allow anyone besides you or your husband to spank your child?

Click here to read the Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8 or Chapter 9, Chapter 10 post or go to the categories section and select book reviews. A big welcome to anyone hopping over here from we are THAT family for Works for Me Wednesday. Please join us next week Tuesday stateside time and Wednesday Guam time for Chapter 12.

I Spare No Expense for My Daughter

You will notice in this first picture what I like to call "beginner stilts." She likes to walk around in them, and every once in a while she let's me wear them too. I'll sacrifice anything for my daughter's physical development.

Second we have a container that she loves so much that she brought it along in the car ride. Some people call it an empty Parmesan cheese container that I should have thrown away, but she thinks it's something to treasure and loves to open and close the lid and drop things inside it. I'll do anything for my daughter's happiness!

And lastly, I always makes sure she's wearing the latest designer fashions. Because I'll do anything to make sure my daughter is looking her best!

Actually, we spend very little on her because it's just not necessary and I think items like these give her huge imagination a chance to really sore. Hand me down clothes are awesome too and sometimes it's just nice to dare to bare. Live simply, Laugh Often, Love Always!

What unconventional toys do your kids play with?

Two Hands, One Heart

Dear Briella,

Sometimes

You are a handful


And Sometimes

You are three handfuls

and I wonder why I only have two hands


Sometimes

You make my heart swell up

And Sometimes

You make my heart burst

Because one heart just isn't enough

to hold all the love I have for you.


Sometimes

I want to hold you tightly

But Someday

I must let you go


So Today

I will teach you with my two hands

and my one heart

to love the Lord our God

with all your heart, soul, and mind


Because

He can make two hands work like three

and one heart love perfectly like His


Someday

You will understand


But for now,

Someday must begin with today.


III John 1:4 "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth."

P.S. You found my make-up bag today too. Maybe I need a third eye as well.

Do you ever feel this way?

Look Mom! My First Blog Award!

Thanks to my blogworld friend Melissa at Melissa's Merry Mayhem, I have received my first blog award! There are no cash prizes, but it kind of feels like when I was a kid and I got my spelling test paper back from my teacher and saw a big "A" and a scratch and sniff popcorn sticker to boot.



Thank you Melissa for my lovely sticker (award) to add to the sidebar of my blog. Isn't it pretty?

Here are the rules for the award:

1. Must thank the person who gave you the award and list their blog and link it.
2. Share "10 Honest things" about yourself.
3. Present this award to 7 (I hope it's okay if I do 6 instead) others whose blogs you find brilliant in content and/or design, or those who have encouraged you.
4. Tell those 7 (6 for me) people they've been awarded HONEST SCRAP and inform them of these guidelines in receiving the award.

Ten honest things about myself in no particular order.

1. I plan on visiting any and all zoos for as long as I live. I don't really like having pets, but I love going to see polar bears, elephants, gorillas, lions, hippos etc. I like the big scary animals.



2. I would much rather spend money to go visit Europe than buy a new car.



3. I am a big daydreamer because I'm just a big kid who still wanders what it would be like to... mix cream cheese, honey, and whip cream, or...ride in a helicopter or...make your own bubble wands.



4. By God's grace, God will always be number one in my heart, soul and mind.



5. I don't like small talk- ya know "Nice weather we've been having." I like to jump right in and say, "Our church has been having some great messages on brokenness, and I'm learning so much."



6. I'm not as frugal as my depression days Grandma, but I don't enjoy spending money on frivolous things. I'm a brown shoes, brown purse kind or girl, but I'm trying to work on enjoying being a girl more especially now that I have a daughter.



7. I like being a late night owl and an early to rise person, but not consecutively because then I become a prop your eyes open with a toothpick type person.



8. If I could only give my daughter 3 toys I would give her a ball, a book and blanket. This is a future post if I ever get around to it. The idea is to let her imagine what she can do with the toy not the toy tell her what it can do.



9. I'm extremely human. I make mistakes, I worry, I forget things, I don't write my friends enough, and I don't express my love enough so friends and family I LOVE YOU!



10. My friend Tarrah and I used to daydream about owning a hair salon together and having a runway down the middle of the shop to have fashion shows every Wednesday and we told our friends we would hire them as models. Our colors were going to be teal, magenta and white. Can you guess the decade?



And now for my Honest Scrap Award Recipients...



1. Nicole @ Harms Family News: Why? because I love keeping up with the growth of her 2 girls and her honesty about her concerns as a parent and learning new ways to tackle challenges and love her children.

2. Amy @ Let's Explore : Why? She has so many fun activities for kids! She home schools her 2 daughters and has a Let's Explore store as well.

3. Lenetta @ Nettacow: Why? About once a week she does a weekly link round-up of good ideas she's found online and puts them in one post. I love this because it saves me some search time.

4. Monica @ The Writer Chic : Why? She loves being a mother to Seth and has also known the sorrow of motherhood through several miscarriages and losing her infant son Duncan earlier this year but continues to trust the Lord for their future for more children.

5. Tracey @ Girls to Grow : Why? I really enjoy Tracey's book reviews and her perspective on Christian parenting.

6. Beth @ C.BethBlog : Why? Yet another Christian blogger mommy whose stories I can relate to. She has a 3 year old daughter and an almost 1 year old son I believe.

Shepherding a Child's Heart: Ch. 10 Embracing Biblical Methods: A Life of Communication

Welcome to the open discussion and reading of a wonderful book entitled Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp. Feel free to join in!

Chapter 10 in a Nutshell

How much would you be willing to pay or give up to hear you child say one day, "Mom and Dad, I am amazed at how thoroughly I have been prepared for life. I will always be grateful for what you have given me."

My pen was smokin' from all the underlining I did in this chapter so I'll do my best to give you the highlights.

Counting the Cost

"Children require both time and flexibility. Children do not pour their hearts out or open themselves up on a demand schedule. A wise parent talks when the kids are in the mood. Every so often they will ask a question, make a comment, reveal some little aspect of their heart. In those times, when their conscience is stirred, you need to talk. This may require dropping everything else to seize a critical moment."

What might we need to stop so that our hearts and minds can listen? Cleaning (no problem!), cooking, climbing the corporate ladder, television, blogging (ouch!) and the list goes on. It's not that these things can't or shouldn't be done but are we willing to be interrupted for the good of our children?

Tedd says, "The wise parent talks when the kids are ready to talk!"

My toddler version, "The wise parent sits on the carpet and plays and cuddles when the child is ready to play and cuddle! The wise parent picks up the toddler that enters the kitchen calling "Mommy" and makes time for a hug and kiss before sending them back out to go play in the living room."

Your version?___________________

The Blessings of Paying the Cost

Instead of watching your children pull away from you in the teen years because you don't understand, and they don't think you love them, they will know that they don't need to go anywhere but home for their need to be heard, understood and loved.

Communication

"Communication is the art of expressing in godly ways what is in my heart and of hearing completely and understanding what another thinks and feels."

All relationships require communication skills, and so it is our duty to help them develop ways to articulate themselves and to understand others.

Is it Worth the Cost?

"You have only a brief season of life to invest yourself in this task. You have only one opportunity to do it. You cannot go back and do it over."

"Parenting is your primary calling. Parenting will mean that you can't do all the things that you could otherwise do...The costs are high."

"BUT the benefits far exceed the cost."

Discussion/Application

When do you find your child is most open to communicate?

For me as a child it was at night and usually after someone had hurt my feelings that I wanted to talk it out.

For my daughter it seems to be around dinnertime that she wants my attention so I try to prep for cooking during her nap so that I can handle interruptions while I'm cooking.

Next week is THE ROD so I'm eager to see what he says. My backside knew THE ROD well growing up.

Click here to read the Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8 or Chapter 9 post. A big welcome to anyone hopping over here from we are THAT family for Works for Me Wednesday. Please join us next week Tuesday stateside time and Wednesday Guam time for Chapter 11.